Heather says:
With so much bad in this world, I hate to complain about the things that are stressing me out, but sometimes stress is stress. Even stress from positive events can leave a person fighting the desire to curl up in bed and cry. Most of this probably belongs on my personal site, but since my goal is to paint an honest picture, no photo-shopping, no-tight cropping*.
I agreed to speak for the Center for Women’s You Can Do It Series, thinking it was as part of a two person team. Sure, no problem. At the time I agreed I had no idea that it would end up as a two hour program with me speaking solo. I also didn’t realize that it would coincide with the second major deadline of the book, nor did I know that I would have to come up with a meal to “demo” on a local live midday program this Wednesday. Separately the book, the tv appearance, and the workshop are all good things. Together? It’s overwhelming.
So this week’s confessional? I’m cranky and irritable; I’ve  hired a sitter for several days; I’ve locked myself in my closet/office for days on end while my husband wrangles the kids; we’ve eaten a lot of sandwiches; I’ve done the bare minimum with my oldest’s schooling. In general I feel like I’m dropping the ball in several major areas, this site being one.
I just want to ask you to hang tight and bear with me through this week. If you live in the Lowcountry and don’t have anything better to do on Saturday, I invite you to come out to the workshop, it’s on my favorite topic ever, food! Well, the specific topic is Cooking for 1 or 2, but my angle is cooking is cooking once you learn about ratios.
So Home-Eccers, don’t leave me hanging out here alone, what do you have to get off your chest? The Sunday Confessional is now open.
*However, with the food photography, I will use the tight cropping and good lighting because I cook with three kids underfoot, capiche?
Congratulations!! I'm sure it's stressful, but you can do it! You'll feel like Wonder Woman once you make it through 🙂 I'd love to come out and see you, but since I've never heard of low country I'm guessing I don't live anywhere near there 😉
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Hang in there! Your family will survive and you'll knock your audience's socks off. You'll be great!
I call myself a frugal person and try to pinch every penny but in our year of living in NH I have only managed to get the early pay discount for heating fuel once. Sigh. Even though I got too sick to carry forward and it wasn't working, I feel like I dropped the ball on our attempt at a gluten/casein free diet this week. We'll try again later but with better planning on my part. Meanwhile I need to plan menus better!!! And I've neglected my blog again. So here's my public resolution to have an active blogging week so I don't have to confess another week of neglect next Sunday.
You just described, very simply, the complexities of my unsquelchable need to take on too many “opportunities” because each one inspires learning, passion and a desire to make a difference. Intermittent weeks like this happen and push us to our limits. I, for one, happen to think it is good for the family to see mommy working hard and struggling to make a difference for others . It helps the children understand their own moods and dispositions.
I've totally dropped the ball on pretty much everything this week. And I don't have anything (fun! exciting! kind of a big deal!!) going on like you do. I was sick with some kind of flu-ish thing for a week and a half…. and that was a week and a half ago, and I am still in 'oh, I'm too tired' or 'oh, I should only spend a couple of minutes on that, I might wear myself out' mode. I double or triple whatever it is that I cook, when I bother to cook, so that we can just eat the same dinner three days in a row. The past couple of days, I've done some 'surface' cleaning things (like dishes) so that maybe my husband won't notice. But don't look too closely. At anything.
And really, it's sad. Because I am FINE now. Healthy, chipper, capable. And yet…
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Oh wow, you have a lot going on but I think you will do great in all of those areas! Keep your head up. Your family can live with just sandwiches and a few babysitters for awhile! I can say I have felt kind of like you for the past two months. It's been hard trying to get all things done I want done and need done. Stress is something that I think we all have to deal with every day. Just remember it will be all worth it! I am trying so hard to make my blog and writings better, it will get there but it is so frustrating!
You are doing fabulous work and I'm proud of you. Want me to come sit in your closet with you? 🙂
I'm a bankrupt blogger. I'm better at design and set-up. I'm supposed to be working on team t-shirts for the ALS walks, coming up, in the LowCountry, but I can't remember the dates, for them, off the top of my head.
I'm supposed to be planning for a long weekend get-away, to Savannah, but I can't remember that date, either.. or if it interferes with anything else I've committed to do.
My refrigerator is full of fresh vegetables and with my back, lately, I'm afraid they'll go bad before I get anything accomplished with them. I can't even remember how to make vegetable lentil soup, anymore. I may phone a friend.
With Girlie sick, my cat box is being ignored. Now would not be a good time to visit. *giggle* I better stop commenting and go do that right now.
Oh, and I'm working on Sunday. Don't tell. 🙂
feeling overwhelmed here too-don't have near as much going on as you do,honey,but I can relate…I am sooo behind in the housekeeping-especially on our side of the house-the sewing room table needs to be de-cluttered-can't even see the kiddo's school books–need to put away some laundry and sweep,mop,general cleaning….been sick with a respiratory/sinus infection about a week now and I am sooo worn out.Hubby went to a target shoot-can't get any help from him today cause when he gets home he'll hit the bed-he has to work tonight….all I want to do is get in bed and sleep……don't think it's going to happen today though….hang in there….
I feel your pain! Good things can absolutely be as stressful as negative things. It sounds like you have taken the necessary steps to make things work the best way you can for now. That, along with the work you are doing is all you can do.
Although I am guilty of this myself, try not to place unrealistic expectations of perfection on yourself. This can make things worse.
Most importantly Heather, remember that this too shall pass.
Thanks for being so honest, I think that transparency allows others to know you and love you even more!
Leigha
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You do have a lot on your plate right now but I am sure you'll do great with it all. We all get overwhelmed from time to time. Hang in there.
My family is still recovering from Stomach Bug 2010 and I am so behind it isn't funny. We're having a stove delivered Friday and now I am having to break my neck getting the house delivery man clean.
it all sounds incredibly wonderful and so unbelievably overwhelming… hanging tight and sending positive thoughts your way!
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It's hard to have a lot on your plate all at once. This answers your question about BlogHer '10 you posed yesterday – stay home and rest!
As for me, I have completely fallen off the diet wagon and am trying to climb back on again. I haven't been doing my daily Lent readings either. Discipline, discipline, discipline… I am not so good at it.
#1 – a tip from a long time homeschooler (22 years), if you must skip a lot of school for a week, month or even a year, keep up with MATH. Math is the hardest thing to catch up on and also the easiest to forget what you have already accomplished and then you have to back track. You can catch up on all the rest, eventually.
#2 – My confession. Every surface in my bedroom has piles. Piles of clothes, piles of papers, piles of mending, piles of assorted stuff. The bed is covered with clean clothes and some books (Hub is gone so his side of the bed stays loaded). Under the bed is so thick with dust-bunnies that I'm not sure what else is under there. The rest of the house looks somewhat reasonable but it has its share of discrete piles as well.
I feel like chaos has moved in. Hub is working in another state and is gone 12 days out of each 25. I have 2 grown sons who have moved back in (and their stuff, too). I have 2 teen boys still being schooled. I'm a leader in the kids club at church. I work eldercare and am often gone over night. I have to spend a lot of time cooking because 1) those young men are 4 eating machines & 2) we are at the end of a year of unemployment for Hub and I have only been working the last 5 months – money is so, so tight.
I am so pooped out when I get home I just do the bare minimum and then hang out with the guys (I miss them so much while I'm gone). On days when I'm home, I get so easily side-tracked I just don't get as much done as I should.
And don't ask me about my diet!
I feel like I'm dropping the ball in so many areas; and have been dropping the ball for a while now.
I have resolved to push myself a little harder toward a more disciplined lifestyle. Nothing drastic but more balanced. I have also resolved to delegate more effectively; not just when I am running out of my own options and energy and out of desperation. All the guys do help quite a bit but I think they can help a little more and at a higher level if I plan better an am more specific about what needs to be done.
Spring being just around the corner is helping me get motivated. Also, keeping in mind the pressures right now are just temporary helps me keep going.
Cut yourself some slack. Sandwiches, sitters and dad handling the bulk of kid-wrangling duties are all part of real life. Your kids will survive and probably even thrive.
Your advice is great. We don't do traditional homeschooling, as we have a virtual charter school with pretty strict minimums. I just want to be clear when I say we're doing the bare minimum it doesn't mean we are falling behind, just the fun extra stuff has been put on hold. 🙂
Dear CG Jenny,
Thanks for sharing your story. I appreciate knowing that we all have our struggles. I will pray for you to get the balance that you need. It's an area I always struggle with too.
Best,
Stacy
I am so sick of clean my house and the weather being crappy I have been reading like crazy… they are great books, but my house looks as though a tornado went through it.
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Hey, congratulations in advance on all of your "events." Is there any chance of pushing one of them back a bit to make this all more manageable? I guess the only one that seems possible is the book deadline, and I can see why that would be undesirable. Well, I know you'll pull it off. Next week you may need the sitter again to rest!
I dunno, I just feel kind of fuzzy in the head lately. Yesterday was my baby's due date…but we lost the baby last summer. I've been feeling down about that. Other than my usuals, like not exercising enough, I don't have anything super special to report.
I do have a Fearless Friday to report though, even though this isn't the right spot. I made my first ever authentic-style Louisiana creole red beans and rice. With the pickled pork, which I pickled myself, and the andouille sausage. I was exceedingly proud of myself, which is probably something I could confess–annoying pride. I want to practice doing it again a little better for this upcoming weekend when we're having company.
Stacy,
How do you pickle pork? And what cut of pork would you use? Would love to know.
My condolences re: your baby's due date… that is a hard thing.
Hi Alice,
Thanks so much. I'm mostly okay,, but when I think that we could have him/her with us right now, that makes me really sad.
Anyway, as for the pickled pork, I got the recipe from Alton Brown's Creole Red Beans and Rice recipe on the Food Network website–I think it's "www.foodnetwork.com". Just search for his recipe. It was really good. I also have seen a few other recipes and they were very similar. It definitely makes the difference between just a beans and rice dish and one that could be a full-fledged meal in itself.
How have you not resorted to take-out every night? Don't feel guilty, you're keeping it all together. Congratulations on your accomplishments, you need to be proud of those. Things can coast for awhile. It sounds like you have a supportive husband and that matters a bunch. Good luck!
Oh, I forgot to confess. I have already forgotten it is Lent! I need to keep up with my prayers, etc. and I need to let go of my frustrations with my hubby (he came home this hitch a stressed out grump). I want to get back on track with my housework and follow a plan so I'm not fussing with it all day while my little ones are growing up and my oldest is forgotten about.
Breathe and focus. Go and do what must be done. You can leave us alone here for a few days, we'll be fine.
And we don't even need a sitter.
(most of us, at least)
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Breathe and focus. Go and do what must be done. You can leave us alone here for a few days, we'll be fine.
And we don't even need a sitter.
(most of us, at least)
My recent post Over
Breathe and focus. Go and do what must be done. You can leave us alone here for a few days, we'll be fine.
And we don't even need a sitter.
(most of us, at least)
My recent post Over
Cut yourself some slack and let the family pick up some responsibilities once and a while. Consider it good training and preparation for real life. Mom won't always be there. It will also make your husband appreciate what you usually do even more.
*sending strength, energy and calm*
What I do when I know things are going to get crazy- I give the family a big "head's up". I tell them that I'm going to be busy for xxxx amount of days, times and that they need to help out. Kids can help with dinner, dad will run errands, and if anyone has something they need taken care of for next week they better let me know now. Bring all your dirty laundry downstairs (older kids can wash their own) and let them know they need to help each other out. It usaually gets a little bumpy during that time and there's always one or two things that go awry but they are learning. That might mean peanut butter sandwiches for breakfast, lunch and dinner, but don't worry. They didn't starve.
Consider these times as doing your family a favor by letting them figure things out for themselves. Good training for life ahead.
You posted a sweet "Lowcountry hello" on my blog from a comment I made on Robin's blog. I am probably more of a Coastal plains gal, but I still use the term Lowcountry as a contrast to staying in the Upstate for a while.
Thank you for your photo comment too!
I am a "quiet follower" of your blog – I found it on a link from another blog. Maybe Kimba's?
I read over the Lowcountry blog profile also – neato to find bloggers within the state.
With a pending closing on my first home, I knew that I would probably need to refer back to your blog.
Thank you for your efforts.
And best wishes for decreased stress levels. =)
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Not even a week into Lent, and I've had Taco Bell and Pizza Hut. Neither are my fault, though, so it doesn't count, right?
Heather, just take some deep breathes, sneak in a nap or two, and you will get through it. You are super woman! 🙂